You know what MILF means, right? All my female friends are pretty much all MILFS. It stands for "Mothers I'd Like to F**k".
From the days as a five-year-old in grade two when I would lie on the wooden floor of my private school so that mother's coming to pick up their kids would have to step over me—I had no idea what I should be looking for, but I knew I wanted to see it; to the healthier crush I had on my friend's mom when I was a pre-teen and she was a former national-level basketball blonde queen in her native Lithuania, who was always working on her tan during the hot and sultry Toronto summers; to being 26 and a recently plucked virgin no-more candidly interested in sleeping with any woman who would have me - a Japanese music teacher at one of my schools who was in her early 40s and a 35-year-old fellow assistant English teacher on the JET (Japan Exchange & Teaching) Programme who just so happened to have been a former nude model; to nowadays as a 40-something strapping young man with nary a grey hair on his head (even though I love to play jokes and pranks, I swear it's all natural - sorry… I'm laughing…), who prefers a mature woman with an intelligence over the younger kind (sorry, Sharona)…
(By the way - I'm not saying what I did as a 5-year-old was excusable... I'm just telling you what I recall doing.)
But that's just me. I certainly used to enjoy sleeping with women my own age… and I still do, only now they are in that MILF category.
Which means (as I understand the universe as a 40-something-year-old) these women of maturity don't really need a categorization.
But whither Japan?
Japan's men have supposedly long held an obscenely long fascination with women who look like they are of the schoolgirl age, possessing what can only be described as a Lolita Complex.
But is it a correct stereotype?
According to the porno industry of Japan, perhaps better known as the AV industry (adult video, as opposed to the audio video club, who were those kids even nerdier than myself—my serfs—who knew how to work the school projector back before video tapes and DVDs) it seems like the Japanese industry craves it so it makes a whole lotta Lolita porn for the male clientele.
Certainly there is a large cross-section of men who seem to enjoy that - personally… the only time I ever wanted to screw a teenaged girl was when I was a teenaged boy… though I will come clean and mention that while 29 and in Japan, I did date and sleep with an 18-year-old DD-cup babe who by looks alone should have been a major AV star - but, I did not actually have sex with her. I still don't know why, but the very next day after my date with her concluded (where we just lay together in the same bed—with me tightly pressed up against her, and she constantly wriggling back onto of me - we went to Tokyo Disneyland the next day) I met Nobuko. Dating Nobuko, by the way, was worth me not sleeping with Shinobu and maintaining a non-aided hard-on for 22 hours in that bed. Never done that before or since. Never want to do that again anyhow…
But nowadays, Japan seems to be growing up (I'll know they have finally grown up when one doesn't find a samurai drama on TV), and is watching and demanding a lot more porn with mature women as the come-again starlet… Japan needs more MILF porn, and Japan needs more MILF porn actresses.
Ahhh, Japan. We agree on so many things. Just not your current politics…
How much does Japan want MILF porn? Apparently, in order to find work in the Japanese AV industry, beautiful, young 25-year-old Japanese actresses are lying about their age saying they are beautiful, young 45-year-old actresses.
Interesting… lying to be older to get INTO porn seems to be a long-standing tradition amongst Iowa corn girls having arrived in Van Nuys, California back in the 1980s on up, but in Japan, these are actually girls of legal age trying to get a leg-up as actresses as MILF porn stars.
More demand by its discriminating audience means more money paid for a real laid back acting role. Did you know that a MILF actress gets to take home about 40% of a movie's sales? Sound great, right? Making money, hand over fist?
Well… consider that a movie only needs to sell 500 copies to make a profit (I believe they save a lot of money by not requiring a costume director or a script writer)… but nowadays, with MILF porn becoming a valued commodity, and Japanese viewers now appreciating a softer, curvier view, MILF porno flicks often sell in the 5,000 copy range.
That's interesting. I always assumed there was only one person who actually purchased any porno movie and copied it and sold it, or gave it away as a pirated copy to his pervert friends. This is known as real pirate booty.
Want to know how screwy things are?
Back in September of 1999, there was a famous (for the Japanese AV industry, of course) incident that had Japanese porno viewers aghast that the industry actually used a virgin (debuting actress, actually) 31-year-old actress named Kawana Mariko who starred in a flick called "34 Year-Old Mother Mariko". (That's her on the box cover up above)
People were upset because the Japanese AV industry dared to lie to them by pumping the age of Mariko from 31 to a fake 34.
How could the AV industry lie to its consumers? Was there no honor (and stay on 'er) amongst Japanese porno film makers?
By the way, Mariko was born on November 9 (one day after me), but in 1967 and is 1.65 meters (5 feet-5 inches) tall. So... Mariko was turning 32 in two more months... so it was only a two-year lie. WTF Japan!?
Okay… I need a break. Anyone else wants some ice cream or some juice?
We'll meet back later for more fun in the buff with Japan—It's A Wonderful Rife.
Cheers
Andrew Joseph
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