To anyone who has ever seen the animated film Who Framed Roger Rabbit? the above title should be familiar, as one of the songs in it - and obviously taken from a cartoon of the same name, a Merrie Melodies cartoon from 1931.
This past Monday, the day started off like crap. I was to have left the house late and gone out to interview someone for a magazine article - but they had to cancel at the last minute. No biggie, of course, but that meant I had to now drive in to work through rush hour.
Strangely enough, I still got to work early - relative to the rest of my sluggish co-workers. Then, at work, because our magazine was having graphics issues - which meant we were now pushing the term 'deadline', I had to become involved and deal with things I would not normally have had to deal with had I been out doing an interview - things that weren't part of my original job, but since I was the first one there, I inherited the leadership of it, and even when others came, maintained said leadership.
While you might think that would mean something to the upper mucky-mucks, it did not, and so I had people pressuring me.
And then, when I had just got it put to bed, I get a phone call from someone I had not seen in a long time. She said she knew right away that I was smiling.
After the morning I had?
And I was smiling? How the hell could she hear my smile? But she did, and that made me even happier. It's amazing how a person can impact on your life when you least expect it.
This is also how things were for me when I lived in Japan between 1990-1993.
I could be having the worst self-absorbed 'woe-is-me' day ever, and I would have one of my junior high school students come up to me and say how much they liked me, or that they want to visit Canada (because of me), or become an English teacher (in spite of me, perhaps).
I am writing this as a reminder to all of you foreign teachers out there that even when you think you are having a crappy day - and when you think you aren't making an impact on the lives of those you teach - you are.
People don't do that - certainly not in Japan - and come up and pay a compliment without a reason. They do it because they want to.
Yes, the Japanese are a polite people, and often say 'tabun' (maybe) rather than say the word 'Iie' (no) and disappoint you, but they are an honest people.
They may not always come around and tell you how they really feel - 'genki desu' (I'm fine) - then again, neither do most people.
I like being honest with the Japanese.
About 20 years ago, we foreigners suddenly came up with a saying 'too much information', which, to be honest, pisses me off. Almost as much as being called stupid - but that's another story for another blog I write.
Too much information. Really?
I believe that in order to effectively communicate as a species, we need to get off our collective ass and be more honest with people. If someone you know asks you "O-genki desu-ka" (How are you?), why not be honest?
Tell them you are homesick, or a little angry, or that you are really well.... and explain why.
It invites conversation - maybe not even at this juncture, but later down the road.
I actually had more female friends in Japan with whom I did NOT sleep with (I know, I couldn't believe it either until I stood back and thought about it a few minutes ago) than I did male friends.
In fact... as a man who likes women, exposing my frailties to a woman could be seen as a sign of weakness - or as a sign that you trust them.
So I talked... and I talked... and I talked to people. Even now, I rarely give the "I'm fine thank you and how are you?" response.
In Japan, you can talk to people - in confidence, if you tell them that - and they will respect that. Actually, in Japan, I'm pretty sure that most things I ever said to anyone in confidence remained so - regardless if it was told to a gaijin or Japanese.
What I found to happen often, was that I actually had people respond back to me and tell me their problems - it's like the Japanese were just waiting for this opportunity!
"Oh thank kami (god)!" you can almost hear them exhale. They get a chance to talk, you get a chance to be a friend and listen and maybe even help.
So why should you? Because you aren't just there to teach English. That's boring, though a noble response.
No... call it internationalization if you want, but I prefer to think of it as being human.
Communication. People tend to forget that when they go to Japan, and are either so focused on themselves or on doing their job, that they forget to live a little, too.
And, should you not want to be so honest - because it is difficult to be - smile, darn ya, smile! and brighten up everyone's day. You are in Japan. Or Canada. Or Australia. Or the U.S. Or Indonesia. Or wherever you are.
Enjoy the day, and see if you can hear someone smiling over the phone.
Cheers
Andrew Joseph
This past Monday, the day started off like crap. I was to have left the house late and gone out to interview someone for a magazine article - but they had to cancel at the last minute. No biggie, of course, but that meant I had to now drive in to work through rush hour.
Strangely enough, I still got to work early - relative to the rest of my sluggish co-workers. Then, at work, because our magazine was having graphics issues - which meant we were now pushing the term 'deadline', I had to become involved and deal with things I would not normally have had to deal with had I been out doing an interview - things that weren't part of my original job, but since I was the first one there, I inherited the leadership of it, and even when others came, maintained said leadership.
While you might think that would mean something to the upper mucky-mucks, it did not, and so I had people pressuring me.
And then, when I had just got it put to bed, I get a phone call from someone I had not seen in a long time. She said she knew right away that I was smiling.
After the morning I had?
And I was smiling? How the hell could she hear my smile? But she did, and that made me even happier. It's amazing how a person can impact on your life when you least expect it.
This is also how things were for me when I lived in Japan between 1990-1993.
I could be having the worst self-absorbed 'woe-is-me' day ever, and I would have one of my junior high school students come up to me and say how much they liked me, or that they want to visit Canada (because of me), or become an English teacher (in spite of me, perhaps).
I am writing this as a reminder to all of you foreign teachers out there that even when you think you are having a crappy day - and when you think you aren't making an impact on the lives of those you teach - you are.
People don't do that - certainly not in Japan - and come up and pay a compliment without a reason. They do it because they want to.
Yes, the Japanese are a polite people, and often say 'tabun' (maybe) rather than say the word 'Iie' (no) and disappoint you, but they are an honest people.
They may not always come around and tell you how they really feel - 'genki desu' (I'm fine) - then again, neither do most people.
I like being honest with the Japanese.
About 20 years ago, we foreigners suddenly came up with a saying 'too much information', which, to be honest, pisses me off. Almost as much as being called stupid - but that's another story for another blog I write.
Too much information. Really?
I believe that in order to effectively communicate as a species, we need to get off our collective ass and be more honest with people. If someone you know asks you "O-genki desu-ka" (How are you?), why not be honest?
Tell them you are homesick, or a little angry, or that you are really well.... and explain why.
It invites conversation - maybe not even at this juncture, but later down the road.
I actually had more female friends in Japan with whom I did NOT sleep with (I know, I couldn't believe it either until I stood back and thought about it a few minutes ago) than I did male friends.
In fact... as a man who likes women, exposing my frailties to a woman could be seen as a sign of weakness - or as a sign that you trust them.
So I talked... and I talked... and I talked to people. Even now, I rarely give the "I'm fine thank you and how are you?" response.
In Japan, you can talk to people - in confidence, if you tell them that - and they will respect that. Actually, in Japan, I'm pretty sure that most things I ever said to anyone in confidence remained so - regardless if it was told to a gaijin or Japanese.
What I found to happen often, was that I actually had people respond back to me and tell me their problems - it's like the Japanese were just waiting for this opportunity!
"Oh thank kami (god)!" you can almost hear them exhale. They get a chance to talk, you get a chance to be a friend and listen and maybe even help.
So why should you? Because you aren't just there to teach English. That's boring, though a noble response.
No... call it internationalization if you want, but I prefer to think of it as being human.
Communication. People tend to forget that when they go to Japan, and are either so focused on themselves or on doing their job, that they forget to live a little, too.
And, should you not want to be so honest - because it is difficult to be - smile, darn ya, smile! and brighten up everyone's day. You are in Japan. Or Canada. Or Australia. Or the U.S. Or Indonesia. Or wherever you are.
Enjoy the day, and see if you can hear someone smiling over the phone.
Cheers
Andrew Joseph
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