Are You Lonely Tonight? A Look Inside The Mind

I was asked by Vincent who plans to make his first trip to Japan later this year whether or not I felt any loneliness or homesickness while I was in Japan for three years.

At the time, I would have said no to homesickness for Canada, although a read into the diary I kept might say otherwise.

I'm still going to say no to homesickness.

Sometimes loneliness brought on by my own delusions. I was never alone. But I always required a girlfriend (at that time) to make me feel like someone needed me.

That's stupid, of course. But that's what the mind sometimes does. So... no to loneliness.

I would say that if you are lonely in Japan, you aren't trying hard enough. That doesn't mean you need to have friends over every night, of course. I was there in Japan between 1990-1993 and the Internet was not yet a part of my vocabulary despite having been surfing message boards since the late 1970s as a kid.

I had the telephone, and a friend was as close as the 47 numbers I had to press to talk to someone. Seriously, though... pick up the phone - call someone.

E-mail is great for quick, but distant relief, but having someone to talk to - that's priceless. Instant Messaging - nice also. I have used that for a quick chat with as special someone, but nothing beats either hearing their voice or the physical contact.

Me? I'd go for physical contact any day.

This augers well for Donald...

So... whenever I would feel the need for contact and Matthew was busy or Ashley angry at me or asleep, I would call up a fellow JET. Or they would call me. Kristine? That girl got me through many a night simply by letting me enjoy her breathy sarcasm. I loved her voice. I loved her sarcasm. And she was/is a damn nice pleasure on the eyes. Married with her first child a little over a year - or is it two years now?

As well, sometimes it's good to get out of routine. What's wrong with going to a bar and having a drink? Don't drink? Have a soda. Just get out. Go to a restaurant. Absorb what is around you. Even if now one is there who wants to talk to you. Absorb. Write everything down. What does the place look like? Smell like? Prices? Menu of goods? Learn.

Culture shock? What's that?

You have gone to Japan to learn more about another culture. It's supposed to be different.

Naw, I've never had culture shock.

I had an open mind. Therefore it was just something new to learn about. Embrace it.

I had it in my mind that I should learn something new every single day while in Japan - so as to not have wasted the day. It's why I write now - I learn so much every day. About myself and about other things, people and places. Look how much you and I have learned today!

It's all about putting a positive spin on things.

You readers are actually quite fascinating to me. I want to know who reads these things - and why? What makes you think I know anything? I do know plenty, but sometimes I know things I haven't given much thought to. Ask me a question and I'll see if I can provide an answer.

Hell... until Vincent asked, I never wondered about loneliness or culture shock.

For me, Japan was all about adventure. I loved reading about it, yet had experienced few until trekking to Japan.

The point about adventures... you never know what you will find.You have to get out of that safe place and get out of the rut. Been there done that and I'm always looking for something new to learn or do. 

I think I know what he's touching. Been there, done that...

I used to read Donald Duck and Uncle Scrooge McDuck comics for that same reason as a kid - adventure. Discovering a lost Viking treasure, hidden peoples within the Florida swamps, lost cities in the shifting sands of the Middle East, untold treasures and mysteries of the Flying Dutchman.

And now I read those comics to my son. It keeps the spirit alive.

And when I write, I try to do the same. Sometimes it works, other times not so well...

Why did I keep a diary in Japan? My parents said I should because they said so much will happen to me in Japan that I will scarcely remember it all.

Shinobu and I with my shirt off at Tokyo Disneyland. Or is that Br'er Bear?

True. I re-read the entries and go, whoa... did I do that? What was I thinking... and read further and go wow, so that's what I was thinking. It's a fascinating adventure into the past of myself.

Recall Dr. Seuss... look at all the places you'll go...

My friend Matthew... he has few recollections of the things he and I did together and so re-reading them he wonders where HIS mind is/was at... and gets to experience them again for the 'first time'.

For those of you thinking about going to Japan for that first time - like Vincent - I envy your upcoming adventures.

It certainly won't be the same as what I experienced - I hope not - because everything you experience will have meaning to you.

How about that? Donald doesn't have the oddest chin.

I just hope you will share those experiences.

Somewhere white ducks can't fly but can fly an airplane,
Andrew Joseph